i don't wait, i always just let it go

If there's one thing i have learnt that has really affected my perception, it's that people wear masks. Some people look like total dweebs because of the way they act and the way they look- but some of them are not freaking DWEEBS at all. They are pretty smart people.
Don't Judge.

Also i've always wanted to say, that i love captcha's!
I love the blogger one's especially- because they give you these rad one's that half make sense. And i just love to pronounce it to my self.

I got my math results back. 22/25! I was pretty happy with it. I could've gotten 24! but you know what? i am just really silly at times. I freaking didn't write two of my answers in the simplest forms and i got one wrong, but i had it right before but then i crossed it out and wrote an answer close to my original but wrong!. I swear my mind can really screw me. I hate freaking multiple choice in exams. I really do.
I remember in geography, history and english exams for our school certificate trials i only lost marks in the multiple choice sections. And my extended and short responses were full marks!
i am honestly a lost case.

I have two freaking english essays due next week. Just for homework, one of them is for extension the other for advanced.
I have written about four essays in total now. I'm getting better at it! Which is good.
Yay for improvement.

Anyways. I've realised that i get annoyed at people really easily but i have this way of tolerating it until i understand them and eventually accept them. Do you get me? Its only some people. But i'm kind of worried, most of the time i just keep what i think of other people to myself, like if i don't like a person that much- i won't really say anything. I think its because i feel that there's a lot of bitterness when people bitch. It just really sucks. I've listened to people talk about other people, and they just sound so bitter and unaccepting.
But i do express my feelings. I talk to people about whats bothering me.
But there are only a few people that actualy bother listening.
Some people they look at you, realise your sad, ask whats wrong and then when you tell them they don't listen.
I haven't spoken to anyone but Alicia about what i'm feeling.
I told her everything. Almost everything.
And it felt good. She listened, and not many people do that.
I don't want to seem so needy. I miss being independent.
But it freakin' sucks when you're friends are drifting.
And then you try to rationalise, it doesn't matter that they're drifting its not like you'll be friends with the after high school.
Its true though.
And i'm sorry for thinking that. As much as i'd like to think everyone will still be my friends, there's definitely only going to be a couple.

Things are looking better.
Its nearing 1am! i have work today. I don't know what time. Maybe 11.30 am. I should call at 10 and ask. During the summer i was at work pretty much three times a week and i got really close to everyone, hopefully my being there only once a week for what 4 hours won't suck.
I like work sometimes. Its like school except you just don't do intellectual things, unless zac tries to debate you. I challenged him on his freaking male supremacy beliefs and our society being patriarchal. The people i work with are so different to the people i hang around with at school, so its mad.